Who the heck is Chris Jardieu?

I never wanted to be a writer.

Requires too much thinking, doing and redoing. Invites scrutiny and faint praise. Sparks irrelevant debate about Oxford commas and incomplete sentences. Blech.

No, what I wanted to be was


Dress for the job you want like an extra in a movie on a cruise ship.

💡 an idea haver 💡

a lightning bottler, a thought peddler, a wall spaghetti thrower

Joke’s on me because in order to bottle lightning and peddle thoughts and throw spaghetti, you have to communicate.

Like other CD portfolio About pages, I’ve got hobbies and interests and a cute maybe-believable anecdote about my 3rd grade teacher who told me I would never be a writer. Or did she tell me I would be a writer? Or was it my high school English teacher? Which one fits this narrative better?

I’ve written too much. Probably because I love writing. Go figure.

I’ll stop, and you can click:

The Work

The Resume